This review is part of the Monster Trailies Lap France mega-test review. Click the link for the rivals.
I'm glad to get out of our rats' nest hotel on the outskirts of wherever and hit the bloody road. This is becoming as much a test of personal endurance as of motorcycles but we've got a job to do and I have to stay positive. I've got enough Codeine to stun an entire Columbian platoon so my back shouldn't cause serious problems, I have an unusually mellow hangover and I happen to be riding the most comfortable bike in this pack, which also happens to be fitted with heated grips. Result.
Comfort is pretty much the only consideration when huge distances lie ahead. Thirty years of motorcycling has had a punishing effect on my brittle chassis so I'm relieved to be heading out (into what will be another very long day in the saddle) on the Suzuki V-Strom. With the exception of the Buell, all the bikes here are fit for the long haul, but the Suzuki narrowly pips its competitors in the comfort stakes. The relationship between the screen, bars, seat and foot pegs is spot-on and makes for a perfectly relaxed riding position.
It's always uplifting to start the day with quality Tarmac and that's precisely how it begins: smooth, fast, twisty and mainly dry. I know all the others are smiling behind their visors too as the monotonous damp horror of the previous day's travel quickly evaporates. Comfort is the obvious ace in Suzuki's pack, but it'll handle aggressive bend slinging without getting flustered. It's fair to say that it hardly excels in any other department, but nor does it disappoint - it just gets on with it, quietly, competently and without fuss.
Fun aside, we know we have to maximise the rain break and find our fabled waterside campsite. After all, the V-Strom's luggage bears the tools of the experienced outdoorsman - including electric inflatable bed and my entire personal travel knife collection: 2 x cooking, 1 x hunting, 1 x fighting, 1 x throwing. I'd forgotten my axe (left it on the ferry) but I've a blade for most occasions.
This of course means getting back on the motorway and hightailing it over to Tours for provisions and deranged campfire shenanigans. The Suzuki is restricted by luggage-based aerodynamics to a cruising speed of around 95mph (above 105mph it develops into a weave). This speed works well though, because you get an acceptable balance of wind noise, buffeting and fuel consumption - the latter averaging out at 40mpg, which is impressive for a 1000cc bike with full luggage, and good for a minimum of 150 miles between fuel stops.
